Part 2
Click here for Part 1 if you want to read it.
The meds really drain my energy. When I first got on them, I would nap for at
least 3 hours after classes, even if I had a good night’s sleep. I have been able to adjust to them more since
then, but my full energy never returned.
Another side effect.
If you have a friend going through a
storm….
Please don’t act like it’s a big deal
when you help a friend going through a storm-
No driving for 6 months (normal restriction after a seizure) during my
student teaching. Relying on friends
during hard times is tough. I had friends
give me a ride from campus to my apartment just a couple times and act like
they hung the moon for me. Don’t get me
wrong, it was helpful, but I had people I barely knew offer to do that much for
me.
Please, don’t get upset when your friend
can’t be there for you during their storm-
I had several close friends try to deem
what was best for me or our friendship and get upset that I couldn't be there the
way they wanted me to at the time, instead of just making the time to be there
and ask what my needs were. It's not
like any of us want to be in a time of extra need or vulnerability, but it
usually happens to everyone at some point.
I’m really sorry that I forgot to ask how your day was, when I was
struggling to stay awake while at the same time making sure I got enough sleep
and didn’t drink too much caffeine, find a ride home, cope with an abusive boyfriend who eventually left me during the storm, remember to take my meds,
remember what I was going to be teaching the next day, AND keep up with my
friends too. I wasn’t meaning to forget
about you EVER, but at that time, I was in hell. Where were you?
Please don’t act like doing a simple
thing for a friend in a storm is a hardship for you-
I mentioned in the last post that a
family member had a pretty traumatic experience too. My sister broke her back when she got bucked
off a horse at the beginning of this year.
She was bed-ridden for weeks. The
only thing she could do was watch tv or look at her phone. When I saw how depressed she was about the
injury and possibility of not riding again (plus the fact that she had crappy
friends who barely visited her), I set up a surprise event online, asking
friends to mail her some snail mail to give her something else to do. Two weeks
later, my sister had received ONE thing in the mail! It was sent by MY sweet brother-in-law
and sister-in-law. My brother-in-law has spent maybe a few hours with my little
sister, and my sister-in-law has never even met her....and some of those
invited to send encouragement have known her for YEARS! How discouraging! It's
"friends" like this that have made my sister want very little to do
with church people. STEP UP. BE JESUS.
Unless you had an excuse worse than breaking your back, it takes only a
few minutes to pick out a card, write a few sentences, address and stamp it,
and put it in a mailbox. I actually had a friend text me and tell me so many
people only do online stuff now that that’s why no one was taking the time to send
something in the mail and that I should set up a Facebook group to post
comments for my sister. Really? Did you NOT just read that Facebook and tv is
ALL she could do all day? I was trying
to give my extremely discouraged sister something a little more than a Facebook
comment that takes all of 5 seconds to type.
My sister doesn't have the type of godly, caring friends that I do (or thought I did)....this was supposed to help, but instead it showed me just how
many people I can count on in times of need. (Note- a few more people stepped
up after I wrote this summary on Facebook right after her accident, so she
ended up getting a few more things delivered. To those, I am extremely thankful.)
EVERYONE has a busy life. That is the
CRAPPIEST excuse, and my sister and I both heard it. You don't think everyone has busy times in
their life? Yes we all do, but don't neglect your most loyal friends in their
biggest times of need. BE THERE for the ones you care about, ESPECIALLY during
the hardest times of their life!
If you speak of loving people well, but
can’t find time for something as simple as a sympathy card in the mail, your
love is immature. If you speak of loving
people well, but you pat yourself on the back for giving someone a ride home
once or twice, your love is conceited.
If you get angry at a friend not showing you attention during THEIR
storm, your love is selfish. Love is not
just being there when it’s convenient, sometimes it’s about being there when it
isn’t convenient at all.
It’s as simple as this. If you think any of what I posted applies to
you, whether it was in my situation, my sister’s, or a completely different
situation, this is just meant to encourage people to brave the storm with your
friend, instead of complaining about the rain through it. Like I said above, no one wants to be in a
lightning storm, but it happens to everyone at some point. If you haven’t been through one, your time
will come eventually…and I sure hope you have friends to walk through the
floods….because if you don’t, the pain cuts even deeper than the storm by
itself. And if you are walking through
one right now, please let me or someone else you trust know what is going
on. I want to walk with you. No one should feel as alone as I did.
Love,
Leslie
P.S. I do want to let a few people know I was extremely grateful for your encouragement and care for me during these horrible times- My family, education professors, Penn1 guy friends, Amber Webb, Allie Thompson, Angela Long, Bekah Brown, Emily Huebner, and anyone I barely knew who gave me a ride in those 6 months, and anyone who sent my sister something in the mail. Your kindness did not go unnoticed, I promise!
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